Friday, October 16, 2009

dimaag ka bharta

I am sure that it happens with all of us. As the twilight approaches its end and we see the birds flying back to their nests; loads of vehicles clogging the roads, while each one of them trying to reach its destination, asap, which supposedly is the home; a cooker will be whistling in some kitchens indicating that dinner time is approaching and the kids in the house will start picking up their thrown away toys and books, since daddy will be coming in sometime; and entire day will be winding up and all that remains is a look-alike of a vacuum that you know can be filled by only certain people of your life. And then all of a sudden, you find that despite having everybody out there, the vacuum is still a vacuum. This happens with me a lot of times, as the day ends, I feel very depressive. People suggest me that I should do things I enjoy doing, but that is exactly what is depression, you stop doing things, you enjoy doing.

Anyway. This is not about my depression. Its more about why do we feel lonely, while living right in the middle of the world, with loving family members, understanding friends, dreams for future, hopes for present and pleasant memories of past. Yet! We feel lonely; we check all the numbers in our phonebook, yet do not call anyone; we read all our sms, yet do not smile; we browse Internet and feel even more depressive. However, as the sun rises, things get better and you start the next day with a far better attitude.

Why does it happen so frequently with me, during nights? What is there like this in nights?