Thursday, March 13, 2014

Random Ranting!!

Why did Kalki talk so much?

No wonders, men have difficulty in understanding us. They accuse us of talking a lot, frequently changing topics, and usually not reaching anywhere. I think Kalki proved all that. Hilarious it is, a lot of women on facebook have liked and shared her monologue, many of whom have not even heard it complete. I saw it full and liked it for a few things - especially, her ability to pull it off so well - she will get a mention in my public speaking classes for sure - and of course, the variety of examples she talked about to bring forward the cosmopolitan nature of atrocities against women. I feel sorry for them at those times and I still feel sorry for so many of us, getting humiliated and hurt, every now and then. But as soon as my heart starts to melt, I come across some of these new-aged men-in-female-bodies who are on a show-men-their-place mission. We live in funny times, some of us get beaten, and the others beat! Sometimes, I wonder what takes a woman to win love of her man! Or maybe, it is just my idea of euphoria... !

Queen of Hearts!

They say, in order to change your life, you have to change your thoughts. So, when the usual set of priorities did not yield very encouraging results, I decided to push myself to shuffle the current list of choices. We humans love settling down, even if that means in a deep hole of shit! If we have stayed there long enough, we perhaps prepare ourselves to stay there all our lives - convenience is very comfortable. While evaluating my perimeters of self-importance and happiness, I realized that entertainment must be lifted a few ranks up. So far, I was only into books and some writing. Music too was not happening much due to loss of earphones. In fact, books are no more means of entertainment for me - they are more of 'necessary for survival' stuff. There are chances of my losing sanity, if I do not see some book in the close vicinity. So I needed some intense shot of entertainment in order to revive my otherwise arid state of mind - and that was Queen! So, despite of not having any good enough reason to go and watch a movie (yes, I belong to that sector of society, which watches movie in a hall only on special occasions), I went. While standing outside the theatre with my ticket in hand, I felt like an invisible lonely ghost amidst men and women. But then immediately I showed a 'thenga' to myself saying that I can do this.. if the heroine in the movie can go to her honeymoon all alone, I can at least watch a movie. Soon after the movie started, I got 'Rani's' company, which I felt really bad to leave when the movie ended. It was so amazing that I can't even describe how amazing I felt. I am not really sure, which feeling took me higher - watching a good movie after a long long time, or just seeing myself happy for no reason. I think I would see Rani, very frequently now.

The Bachpan Box

Being a new age Mom, I too was very particular about keeping a track of my daughter's milestones. Ya, I do not have dates of when she showed her first teeth or took first step or called me Mumma for the first time, but I did try to keep a few things that would take her back when she will be old enough to understand all this - things like her first broken toy, palm and foot prints, first bangles, etc. Then, she started breaking so many toys that it became difficult to keep a track of them, in fact, many a times, while collecting her broken toys I wonder over her ability to dismantle them. I mean, with her tiny hands, how much she can de-engineer them - but then she does that, every single time and for every single toy. Some features are very prominent, eg. none of her wheel-toys have more than one wheel; none of her soft-toys have any eye, the ones with bulging noses do not have noses as well, a singing doll she had is naked with her limbs perpendicular to each other; her JoJo rides her tricycle, while she only pushes it like a baby in the pram (fyi, no one can touch her JoJo, the ugliest doll of the lot, which she is totally in love putting all the better ones in complex); etc. I know all kids do similar things and I must not complain, if my little darling is more interested in their anatomy than playfulness. She knows all her broken toys go into her Bachpan Box, and now she herself put the toys there. The Bachpan Box has lost its meaning, till the baby is old enough to understand this - so I have started a new curation technique for her childhood milestones. Apart from being a toy-scientist, she is a keen questioner and a very expressive person. She makes wonderfully clear opinions and narrates them very mindfully. But in order to witness them, you have to be very aware of her self-talking. The moment you point her, she would stop talking and become conscious. Every day is so full of amazing and new for her. She gets amused beyond description and enjoys them thoroughly. She observes the shapes, sizes, colours, and similarities with other stuff. So, I have started jotting down her curious comments and observations. Like, every evening she will peep out of the window and check if stars have appeared or not. If she sees them she will declare "aaj badal nahi hai"! I am not sure, what is it that she really looks for - stars or clouds. She sees one and infers for the other. Similarly, she won't call laddus as laddus - they all are 'Bheem! Chota Bheem'; just as all creatures with big ears are "mickeyyyy". Recently, I fell asleep while reading and when my mom tried to awake me, she remarked, "mummy ko bhi diaper pehnana hai?" She is convinced that only two places, her granddad can be found are 'awwpheece' and bathroom. "Baithe hain", she would declare pointing to the bathroom. She is also particular about who can touch her. Some kids in the locality are not allowed to come any closer than 2 feet. She would exclaim, "pareshaan kyun kar rahe ho. Abhi bataun?" She would then look at me to perform that "bataun" part. Some bhaiyaas are "kitne patle"; she also knows who lives in which house and who lives in which lane! The other day, she saw our gardner wearing dhoti and she chuckled, "pandit ji aaye hain". Our milkman calls her 'gudiya', which she did not understand initially, now she calls him 'gudiya'. Seeing his cycle, she would shout, "gudiya doodh laye hain"! Even the milkman can't stop grinning, almost every day. She has learned some numbers and everytime she is chided for something, she would come, hug us and count all of them - of course, she knows this will please us and she is right, usually and for most things. I think all her dialogues, even if they are usual and natural for the kids of her age, are too cute, awesome and need to be well documented. When she will be a teenager, I will tell her how good she has been with words and how she has been a reason for joy and smiles for so many people. Broken toys will surely make her emotional, but these dialogues, I wish, would also make her sensible and lovable. 


Holi now is very less about colours and only a little bit about gujiya. It is an important Hindu festival, without seemingly any important characterstics left. In fact, so many people do not even come home during holi vacation. It has become so trivial. And on top of that, the tradition of making papad!! I feel so irritated seeing Mom doing all of it. I have no idea why I feel so. I dislike the thought that she is wasting so much of her energy in this scorching Sun just to make something, which we will fry, eat and forget - all in less than 10 minutes. Why is food so special in our functions. As long as I could remember, I have seen my mother and aunts, spending their entire festival in kitchen - cooking for three or four nuclear families, who have decided to spend the festival together. I guess, the entire concept of hearty meals during festivals should be replaced with specially light meals, so that our women get more time to live outside kitchen, or may be we should get men do all the cooking during this time. This reaction is more revenge driven than radical. I feel sorry for endless hours spent in kitchen, just because the families love eating! And when you say I do not want to cook this much - you are tagged with all sorts of non-sense. It is this compulsion to cook every day and in a certain way that makes cooking such a mundane task, which deep down my heart scares me. The question of it not meeting expectations puts me off. I have realized that I cook much better when I am the only one to eat. Cooking has become that kind of art for me, which brings in me the best and the worst of the emotions, ranging from full-on-creativity to deathly-scare-of-getting-taste-approval. If given a choice, I would like to cook only for myself. You know, staying in that hearth where everyone's welcomed but nobody's invited. 

The Malaysian Airline

My heart goes for those sitting inside that fateful airplane. Where could it be? I wish, even if there is just one percent chance of it, it has landed on some obscure island, hidden under the dense flora making it unable for Satellites to track. Whatever. Even if it is unrealistic - I wish the passengers are fine. Call it knowledge or call it side effects of knowing too much, I doubt my wish holds any ground!